Fred G Here
Yo all welcome back, hope you all had a great summer, I heard Andy B and his girl yo saved a small country in Africa from thirstation by learning how to rain dance from a small tribe in CT, now they are about to embark on adopting a small children from that same country, way to go Andy as if savin the Catrina peoples was not good enough to make us all look bad. I heard The Brother got another DUI, did a stint in rehab and is resting comfortably at his grannies. I heard Ned made another million. (FUCKER) Jenny X is a chumpion at his club. Curious....well I only heard from him when he was faced. God bless Corey Lidel. Steve O dug himself out of a hole and threatens to come back to PDX to kill, and the Bean just threatens. Day One Monday 16. With classic mis information from our team member Andy, who we will call Cliff Clavin from now on, we awoke at a bright and shine 3 am. Thats early people. Bubba picks me up, talk of lack of sleep, anticipation and what a great season it's gonna be ensues. We arrive at the check in gate at a crisp 4:15, second car in line. It seems early, because it is, we don't have to be here until 5:30, another classic H7HT blunder. Remember the mis info from Cliff. We hang with four guys in a Tercel. Finally gates open chips are pulled, Bubba pulls no. 141 ouch, Fred G pulls no. 20 which is good for 4th pick for blinds. Were off to a great start. We get to our blind do a little blind decorating, deeks out, sun up, bottle of So Co down. A little action, a few shots are takin and had, a few too many. My buddy passes out, I cleaned, pull the deeks out, wrap up the rotto, it's bluebird sky now and I get "what the fuck are you doing? did anybody ask me if it is over?" No Shmubba I just thought you would be more comfortable at home sleeping on you couch with Opra, besides half your face is beet red from passing out in the sun I say. "It's not Opra fucker it's Ellen! I got more booze and smokes." So my hunting bud "convinces" me we should throw the deeks back out. Two hours later no shots off no nothing we pack up and go home. Great tacos on the way home though, would have made Jiggity proud. Day Two Wednesday 18. See were the "best ever" cause we learn people. If we go back in time here are some things we have learned; you need a new license at the begging of the year, sometime certain ducks are out of season even though it is hunting season, and the ever popular salt will make your food taste better. Well gosh darn it if we didn't learn something today, you only have to be at the check in station a hour and a half before shoot time. So if shoot time is 7am you have to be there at? ............................ that's right 530am! We don't have to leave at 3:45 but we could leave at 4:45, that's an extra hour for Shmubba to sleep! Picks me up, were on our way, (note: remember when your mom used to or still does drink TAB? Well Bubba greeted me with a TAB energy drink this morning, I think it's for women going through the change, anyway it SUCKS! If you should visit him and he offers you one, say no thank you you FAG cause it SUCKS!) it's Wednesday so it's the day we talk about POWERBALL people, let the dreams begin! Get to the check in station, small wait, we get a new blind we never had before, throw our deeks and it's like JFK at Christmas, the ducks are going off. 7 am hits, it sounds like Nam. I'm shooting at everything, I mean everything! But I'm not knocking nothing down until I fold two that's correct two with one shot and in the same volley another for a total of 3. I am now the new and improved expert. I need respect. A glorious morning folks. You will find a recipe for duck in a mole sauce and a picture of the 3 ducks I murdered today, if you notice the middle one I just wasted, damn I'm good. Anyway that's pretty much it for now, until next week. And thanks for coming back.
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