Poetry For November

November, the month when hunting gets great.
The suns rays wane and lose their hold.

New ducks from the north come to meet their fate.
Driven from the wind, driven by the cold.

Shooting ducks now at a greater rate.
November is the time we really get to fold.

GBCH

The History of Jenny X. Part X

Today I will put forth the photographic proof that it was Jenny X. who created the Izod trend. In this archival photo we can clearly see Jenny wearing the precursor to the Izod alligator shirt. Not being one to be satisfied with the 'Polo' shirt Jenny added a small reptile to his chest and launched a legend.

Of course wearing an actual reptile was too hardcore for most shirt wearers of the day. So the Izod company, following Jennys' lead, decided to sew a small reptile to their production garments. Not wanting to claim the royalties Jenny allowed the idea to spread to the people of the world where it continues today.

Jenny X. master of fashion.

So endeth the lesson of Jenny X.

Remember The Days When....

we used to kill ducks?

Guest Editor

HA! It is I Greenie.

I see you drove up to my chateau this morning nice and early. I bet you were dissapointed in your timing you ridiculous excuses for hunters. Maybe if you had the ability to read you would know that today is the day we laugh at your stupid system of permits and time tables. We will spend the day eating and getting stronger so that we may fly by you at 70kph while avoiding you inaccurate shots from your feeble Italian guns. By the way it is 2006 you ignoramus. See you next week losers.

I quack in your general direction.

Day four and Day five.

You will notice that todays picture has nothing to do with the HOY7 hunting team or hunting in general. There is good reason for that fact and I'm here to tell you faithfull readers all about it. First, let me apoligize to 'Master of information and team member in good standing..... Cliffy.'


The team spent day four at Laurelhurst park. I know what you are thinking and you are right, hunting at the park is certainly illegal and most likely a good way to actually bag your limit. Sometimes it is a good idea to spend a little time giving back to the community you live in. Nobody knows this better than the wonderful staff at 3 Doors Down Cafe'. Although no ducks were slaughtered a good time was had by all, especially Ruldolph the Ivan. ( He hates on the Mexicans and Taiwaneese, what a dick!)

We did learn something on day four as well. Never, and I mean NEVER put anchovies in your dishwasher at home. If you must wash anchovies do it in Ruldolph the Ivans' dishwasher. Hope you liked the food and grog dick.

Day five is a much different story and I'm sad to say it was I, Bob DaFolder, that made todays fatal error. I chose to not believe in a valued team member. A team member with a boat. A former 'expert'. A guy whose knowledge in areas of trivia and stats qualifies him as Cliffy.
Anyway, when Cliffy said that there was no hunting today I chose not to believe him. Maybe I wanted it so bad that I was willing to overlook what season catalogue I was looking at. Maybe I needed to fold so much that I didn't double check my facts. But no matter how bad I wanted it the fact remains that it was me that screwed up.

Today is October 30th. October 30th there is no hunting allowed anywhere.

There, I admit it. Let the scorn and ridicule begin. And I'll tell you what we learned today. Never trust an Itialian with a Itialian gun. Ruldolph the Ivan could have told you that.

GBCH.

Why Should We Not Trust This Man?

After all he was an expert once...once.

If You See This Man...Don't Trust Him!

Mr. Mis Information aka. Cliff Clavin

aka. Mr Inquisitive aka. Salsa Boy

aka Mr. Observant aka. tweek

aka. Daff Boyeee aka. Danny

aka. 1/2 pack aka. Easy A.

aka. Hard A. aka. Mr. Resiliant

aka. Pato Slayer (not anymore)

aka. Magnum (like the 357)

This Is Only A Test

Who and why is this person holding 5 Dollars?

Day Three

Day three at the old new spot was definitely one for the record books. Sometimes the perfect blind, the ultimate decoy set and the presence of the best hunters EVER dosen't matter. You see if the ducks aren't flying...... they aren't flying. Not only did we not shoot any ducks on day three we didn't even see any ducks. But that's OK. It was a beautiful day and we didn't have to get there untill 2:00 anyway.

Did we learn something that day? You bet we did.

GBCH.

Fred G. & Easy E. Seperated at birth?

Looking for the one they call Easy!

But here's a flash, they never sees me!

Except when I unload, see, I'll get over the hesitation!

& hear the scream of the one who got the lead penetration!

If you see me, shoot me.

A colorful duck of wooded swamps and streamsides, the Wood Duck is one of only a few North American ducks that nest in trees. Many people consider it to be the most beautiful of all waterfowl.


Size: 47-54 cm (19-21 in)
Wingspan: 66-73 cm (26-29 in)
Weight: 454-862 g (16.03-30.43 ounces)
Medium-sized duck.
Crest on head.
Long tail.
White patches in face.
Long, broad wings.
Small triangular bill.
Iridescent blue-green patch (speculum) on rear of wing, with white trailing edge.
Male colorful and distinctive.

Duck Calls

Congratulations Cliffy

Team member and all around great duck caller Andy has finally gotten a new boat.

Happy drifting Cliffy.

Day Two

All hail the new 'Expert'.
Yep, Fred G is now the new expert of all things relating to duck hunting. This picture was taken on day two of the teams fifth season. Not only did the man take down 3 birds in one volley he also took down 2 birds with 1 shot. This places him in the company of only Bob and Stevearino as one of the most impressive folders working the waters today.

As always we learned something today.
Remember to train your stupid ass dog before bringing it out to hunt around other people. If you are the guy 100 yards away from us today you obviously don't know this. Trust me, nobody likes your dog but you. We are more than capable of getting our own downed ducks and "I'm sorry" barely covers it. Screw you Joe-Bob.

Day One and Two Season 2006-2007

Fred G Here
Yo all welcome back, hope you all had a great summer, I heard Andy B and his girl yo saved a small country in Africa from thirstation by learning how to rain dance from a small tribe in CT, now they are about to embark on adopting a small children from that same country, way to go Andy as if savin the Catrina peoples was not good enough to make us all look bad. I heard The Brother got another DUI, did a stint in rehab and is resting comfortably at his grannies. I heard Ned made another million. (FUCKER) Jenny X is a chumpion at his club. Curious....well I only heard from him when he was faced. God bless Corey Lidel. Steve O dug himself out of a hole and threatens to come back to PDX to kill, and the Bean just threatens. Day One Monday 16. With classic mis information from our team member Andy, who we will call Cliff Clavin from now on, we awoke at a bright and shine 3 am. Thats early people. Bubba picks me up, talk of lack of sleep, anticipation and what a great season it's gonna be ensues. We arrive at the check in gate at a crisp 4:15, second car in line. It seems early, because it is, we don't have to be here until 5:30, another classic H7HT blunder. Remember the mis info from Cliff. We hang with four guys in a Tercel. Finally gates open chips are pulled, Bubba pulls no. 141 ouch, Fred G pulls no. 20 which is good for 4th pick for blinds. Were off to a great start. We get to our blind do a little blind decorating, deeks out, sun up, bottle of So Co down. A little action, a few shots are takin and had, a few too many. My buddy passes out, I cleaned, pull the deeks out, wrap up the rotto, it's bluebird sky now and I get "what the fuck are you doing? did anybody ask me if it is over?" No Shmubba I just thought you would be more comfortable at home sleeping on you couch with Opra, besides half your face is beet red from passing out in the sun I say. "It's not Opra fucker it's Ellen! I got more booze and smokes." So my hunting bud "convinces" me we should throw the deeks back out. Two hours later no shots off no nothing we pack up and go home. Great tacos on the way home though, would have made Jiggity proud. Day Two Wednesday 18. See were the "best ever" cause we learn people. If we go back in time here are some things we have learned; you need a new license at the begging of the year, sometime certian ducks are out of season even though it is hunting season, and the ever popular salt will make your food taste better. Well gosh darn it if we didn't learn something today, you only have to be at the check in station a hour and a half before shoot time. So if shoot time is 7am you have to be there at? ............................ that's right 530am! We don't have to leave at 3:45 but we could leave at 4:45, thats an extra hour for Shmubba to sleep! Picks me up, were on our way, (note: remember when your mom used to or still does drink TAB? Well Bubba greeted me with a TAB energy drink this morning, I think it's for women going throught the change, anyway it SUCKS! If you should visit him and he offers you one, say no thank you you FAG cause it SUCKS!) it's Wednesday so it's the day we talk about POWERBALL people, let the dreams begin! Get to the check in station, small wait, we get a new blind we never had before, throw our deeks and it's like JFK at Christmas, the ducks are going off. 7 am hits, it sounds like Nam. I'm shooting at everything, I mean everything! But I'm not knocking nothing down until I fold two thats correct two with one shot and in the same volley another for a total of 3. I am now the new and improved expert. I need respect. A glorious morning folks. You will find a recipe for duck in a mole sauce and a picture of the 3 ducks I murdered today, if you notice the middle one I just wasted, damn I'm good. Anyway that's pretty much it for now, until next week. And thanks for coming back.

Braised Duckling in Mole Poblano

2 tablespoons sesame oil
2 (4-pound) ducks, cleaned and cut into quarters
Kosher salt and cracked black pepper, to taste
1 cup diced yellow onion
1 tablespoon sesame seeds
1/2 cup seeded and minced chile pasilla
1/2 cup seeded and minced chile ancho
1/2 cup roasted, peeled and seeded poblano chile
1 gallon chicken broth
1/2 cup grated bittersweet chocolate
1/2 cup diced pineapple
1/2 cup white bread, torn into small pieces
1/2 cup crushed ripe plantains
3 tablespoons minced garlic
3 tablespoons creamy peanut butter
3 tablespoons granulated sugar 1 split vanilla bean


In a heavy cast iron pot or Dutch oven, heat the sesame oil over a fire. Rub the pieces of duck with the salt and pepper, and then brown them in the hot sesame oil until they have a rich, brown color. Remove the pieces of duck and set aside in a warm place. Saute the onion, sesame seeds, chile pasilla, chile ancho and poblano chile in the same pot until the chiles are tender. Add the chicken broth, chocolate, pineapple, bread, crushed plaintain, garlic, peanut butter and sugar. Scrape the seed from the vanilla bean into the mixture. Bring the mixture to a boil and the decrease the heat to a simmer by moving the pot to the side of the fire. Let the sauce simmer for 30 minutes. Remove from the heat and puree the mole -- do not seal the blender airtight while pureeing a hot liquid -- and then return it to the pot. Put the pieces of duck in the mole and simmer for 1 1/2 hours. Remove the duck from the mole and serve with the sauce on the side.

Open Invitation

HEY EVERYONE,

This is the year to become a member of the HOY7 Hunting Team. All you have to do is join us for a hunting adventure here in the lovely Pacific Northwest. Don't be lame like Bubba Kuehl, join a winning team.

Membership includes prestige, fame and the knowledge that YOU are in one of the most successful hunting clubs of all time. The cost of a membership is only a plane ticket and some sandwiches so don't be afraid (like Bubba Kuehl) join today.

GBCH

Day One

Guest Editor

HA! It is I, Greenie.

I see you stupid hunters have made it through the summer without shooting your foot off or driving your rediculous trucks off a cliff. Well I am here to tell you that you will NEVER get me or my friends. We have been working out and eating lots of food so that we are fat with muscle. Just try to shoot us down with your crappy Italian guns and your lame 3 1/2 inch shells. We are prepared for your feeble attempts at calling us in and we know all about the 'roto'. HA!, our brains are the size of walnuts you know, not peanuts.

I quack in your general direction.

Guns.....CHECK

Alcoholoroscopes

ARIES (March 21- April 19) Drinking style: Impulsive Aries people like to party and sometimesdon't know when to call it a night. Their competitive streak makes them prone to closing-time shot contests. They're sloppy, fun drunks, and they get mighty flirty after a couple tipples. Getting Aries people drunk is a good way to get what you want out of them, should other methods fail. Aries can become bellicose when blotto, but they will assume that whatever happened should be forgiven (if not forgotten) by sunrise.They can be counted on to do the same for you -- so long as you haven't gone and done anything really horrible to them last night, you sneakyGemini.

TAURUS (April 20 - May 20) Drinking style: Taurus prefers to drink at a leisurely pace, aiming for a mellow glow rather than a full-on zonk. Since a truly intoxicated Taurus is a one-person stampede, the kind of bull-in-a-china-shop inebriate who spills red wine on white carpets and tells fart jokes to employers, the preference for wining and dining (or Bud and buddies) to body shots and barfing is quite fortunate for the rest of us. This is>not to say that the Bull is by any means a teetotaler -- god, no. A squiffy Taurus will get, er, gregarious (full of loudmouth soup, some would say) and is extremely amusing to drag to a karaoke bar when intoxicated.

GEMINI (May 21 - June 21) Drinking style: Gemini's can drink without changing their behavior much-- they're so naturally chatty and short-attention-spanned thatit's just hard to tell sometimes. They can amaze you by conversing with finesse and allusion, then doing something unbelievable in an extremely advanced state of intoxication, like puking in your shoe. Gemini's possess the magic ability to flirt successfully (and uninfuriatingly, which is very tricky) with several people at once. They like to order different cocktails every round -- repetition is boring -- and may create a theme (like yellow drinks: beer, sauvignon blanc and limoncello) for their own amusement.

CANCER (June 22 - July 22) Drinking style: Cancer is a comfort drinker -- and an extra wine with dinner or an after-work beer or six can be extra comforting, can't it, Cancer darling? Like fellow water signs Scorpio and Pisces, Crabs must guard against lushery. Cancers are brilliant at ferreting out secret parties and insinuating themselves on VIP lists -- and, in true Hollywood style, Cancers are never really drunk; instead, they get "tired and emotional" (read: weepy when lubricated). But there'snothing better than swapping stories (and spit) over a few bottles of inky red wine with your favorite Cancer. Even your second-favorite Cancer will do. The sign also rules the flavor vanilla, and you'd be adored if you served up a vanilla vodka and soda.


LEO (July 23 - Aug 22) Drinking style: Leo likes to drink and dance -- they're often fabulous dancers, and usually pretty good drinkers as well, losing their commanding dignity and turning kittenish. Of course, they're quite aware they're darling - Leos will be Leos, after all. They generally know their limit, probably because they loathe losing self-control. When they get over-refreshed, expect flirting to ensue -- and perhaps not with the one who brought them. But Leo's not the type to break rules even when drunk, so just try to ignore it (try harder, Cancer) and expect a sheepish (and hung over) Lion to make it up to you the next day.


VIRGO (Aug 23 - Sept 22) Drinking style: Cerebral Virgos are compelled to impose order ontothei bender. Their famously fussy quest for purity could lead to drinking less than other signs, sure -- but it could also lead to drinking booze neat, to sucking down organic wine or just to brand loyalty. They rarely get fully shellacked -- but, oh, when they do! Virgo's controlled by the intellect, but there's an unbridled beast lurking within, and they let it loose when walloped. It's dead sexy (and surprisingly unsloppy). As one Virgo friend used to declare, "I'm going to drink myself into a low level of intelligence tonight." A toast to the subgenius IQ!


LIBRA (Sept 23 - Oct 23) Drinking style: "I'm just a social drinker," slurs Libra, "it's just that I'm so damn social." Libra loves nothing more than to party,mingle and relate to everyone. Whether dipped in favor of Good Libra (with Insta-Friend device set to "on") or heavier on the Evil Libra side(they are little instigators when bored), the Scales can really work a room. Charming as they are, Libras are notoriously lacking in self-control, however, which can get them into all sorts of trouble -- including wearing their wobbly boots waaaay too early in the evening, flirting with their best friend's beau or even blacking out the night's events entirely. Oops!

SCORPIO (Oct 24 - Nov 21) Drinking style: Don't ever tell Scorpios they've had enough, forthey'll smirk at you and quietly but intentionally keep tippling till they're hog-whimpering drunk, out of 100-proof spite. Scorpios like to drink, and screw you if you have a problem with that. Most of them see the sauce as something to savor in itself, and not as apersonality-altering tool - though if depressed, self-loathing Scorps seek total obliteration. But generally, they're fascinating drinking pals, brilliant conversationalists and dizzying flirts. They also remember everything -- especially what you did when you were blitzed. Only drink with a Scorpio who likes you.


SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22 - Dec 21) Drinking style: In vino veritas -- and, for Sagittarius, in booze blurtiness: When buttered, they'll spill all your secrets and many of their own. Tactlessness aside, Sagittarius is just plain fun to drink with. This is a sign of serious partying (what else would you expect from the sign of Sinatra, Keith Richards, the Bush twins and Anna Nicole Smith?). They're the people who chat up everyone in the room, then persuade the entire crowd to travel somewhere else -- like a night club, or a play ground, or Cancun. Good-natured hi-jinks are sure to ensue (including a high possibility of loopy groping; spontaneous Sag is a brilliant booty call)


CAPRICORN (Dec 22 - Jan 19) Drinking style: Capricorn is usually described as practical, steadfast, money-hungry and status-thirsty -- no wonder they get left off the astrological cocktail-party list. But this is the sign of David Bowie and Annie Lennox, not to mention Elvis. Capricorn is the true rockstar: independent, powerful and seriously charismatic, not too eager to please. And if they make money being themselves, who are you toquibble? But just like most rock stars, they're either totally on or totally off, and they generally need a little social lubricant to loosen up and enjoy the after party, especially if they can hook up with a cute groupie.


AQUARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18) Drinking style: Aquarius and drinking don't go together that well (except for water, that is). They have an innate tendency toward know-it-allism, and if they get an idea while sizzled, they're more stubborn than a stain or a stone. If they're throwing a party or organizing an outing, however, they're too preoccupied with their duties to get combative and they make perfectly charming drunks in that case. Fortunately, they're usually capital drink-nursers. They also make the best designated drivers (if you can get them before they start raising their wrist) Aquarius is fascinated by drunk people and capable of holding interesting conversations with soused strangers while sober.


PISCES (Feb 19 - Mar 20) Drinking style: If you're a Pisces, you've probably already heard that you share a sign and an addictive personality -- with Liz Taylor, Liza Minelli and Kurt Cobain. Not only do Pisces like to lose themselves in the dreamy, out-there feeling that only hooch can give, but they build up a mighty tolerance fast. Who needs an expensive date like that? On the other hand, they're fabulously enchanting partners, whether in conversation or in crime. With the right Pisces, you can start out sharing a pitcher of margaritas and wind up in bed together for days. The phrase "addictive personality" can be read two ways you know.

Chokes.......CHECK

Welcome Back

Hello everyone, 6 days and counting to the big day! And it could not come sooner. Some of us are bored and restless, how bored and restless you ask? Well here is an for instance. Today I stopped by to see my buddy Bob and go over our plan of attack, our mental checklist you might say, gather our gear, stop some leaks, guess were all the water is gonna be, anyway like I said I stopped Bobs house, House a great show on Tuesday night the HOY7HT fully endorses, but as I was saying I park the bike walk around to the back of the house go into the back door and there he is, Bob on couch watching t.v., watching t.v. folks this man is Mr. Project, Mr. Get It Done, Mr. No Sitting Down I Gots Something To Do. He was watchin the tube folks and what was he watching?! Ellen! I said "Dude what the hell are you doing?!!" Bob says "I'm watching Ellen, Tiger Woods is going to be on later." Gee or bored I ask? He was watchin ELLEN!! The nights are getting colder the skys are getting darker.

6 More Days 6 More Days.

Welcome Back.

Whikey.......CHECK

Why Corey Lidle?

Among the baseball stars killed in plane crashes were Roberto Clemente, Pittsburgh Pirates outfielder, killed Dec. 31, 1972, at age 38 while en route to Nicaragua to aid earthquake victims; and Munson, the Yankee catcher killed Aug. 2, 1979, at age 32 in Canton, Ohio.