Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Crazy Andy, where is he now?

Hi,
I clinched my teeth as the 60 pound backpack strapped to my back clipped a sideview mirror and the driver screamed at us, but neither my moto-scooter driver or I looked back. I held on tigher as we hopped onto the curb and sped along the sidewalk before jumping back into a clearing in the traffic. We weaved thru manic kampala traffic while dust glaring in the headlight and noxious diesel fumes permeated my clothes and lungs. Driving north in a minivan the next day felt a little safer, whenever we weren't playing chicken with other vehicles attempting to avoid massive potholes.

Steve Willis, the british owner of a camp/lodge where I stayed up in Murchinson Falls National Park was killed last year by rebels while attempting to rescue a international expedition rafting the entire Nile. His widow is now running the lodge.

The Nile River empties near Cairo, but here in the heart of Africa the Victoria Nile weaves it's way from Lake Victoria, over the Murchinson Falls, into lake Albert, before turning back north thru the Sudan, as the White Nile. There the White and Blue Nile combine in Khartoum to form the Nile.

The animals in Murchinson were decimated during the civil war, but now they are protected and are rebounding surprisingly well. Giraffes, elephants, hippos, water buffelow are all common....and we even saw a lion which is harder to see. At night, thru the canvas walls of the tent, I heard the massive hippos chomping grass and stomping thru camp before making the 3 1/2 mile return trip to lake Albert before dawn.

Back south again, in Jinga, where Lake Victoria pours into the Nile, I have taken advantage of a series of class 5 rapids. It is considered some of the best rafting in the world and we managed to flip a couple of times! But falling into the warm water was nice and floating by local fishermen in basic canoes added to the beautiful scenery.

But, even better was going for a run last night, on the dirt roads out in the rural country where I was constantly stopped by young children with tattered clothes on their back as they ran out to greet me and hold my hand for a few minutes.

I'm off to Mt. Elgon, which straddles the border of Uganda and Kenya. in 3 or 4 days, I will return to Mbale, Uganda and travel by bus to Kenya where I fly to Cairo and then home in about a week.

I hope everyone is well.
Sincerely,
andy

Cold Hard Cash

Behold the somewhat somber face of
Honest Abe. This very piece of good ole American currency came to me today by way of one very dead greenie.

Finally after days of tempting fate, Mr. Greenhead flew by the wrong Benelli totin' folding machine. I gave him about 3 1/2 inches of steel death from a respectable distance of 20 yards or so. After a sucessfull retrieve I came back to the blind to find this finski stuck on a branch just for me. It's been a long time coming, but it sure was worth it.

Monday, November 27, 2006

Day 11


Ahhhhhhhh, the first day after Thanksgiving. That can only mean one thing: turkey sandwich. Thanks Fred G for making the tradition stick. Not only was there horseradish on the sammy but I bet my last dollar that there was some salt too. Add some processed pre-shaped potaoto like chips and you're ready to fold.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

WHAT THE HELL ?


Bob here,
Just wanted to share with all my fellow out of state team members a story of how I find humor in the Portland area. As I was watching the news on FRIDAY evening I had to laugh as this is what LED the braodcast.

"Potential snow storm Sunday evening into Monday morning"

keep in mind this was the POTENTIAL for snow 3 days into the future. Better shut down the city now just in case. It has subsequently been in the news every night since. Likely, if there is any snow, it will be called "Blizzard 2006" or something like that. Round the clock coverage will begin as the first flake of snow falls from the sky. Geeze.

From the KATU news desk: Updated 11/26/2006 6:00 pm
Snow showers will continue tonight and tomorrow for areas of the Columbia River Gorge from Cascade Locks east as cold air stays entrenched there. A snow advisory is posted for 1-6 more inches of snow in the next 24 hours.


Modified arctic air is moving into Northwest Oregon and Southwest Washington tonight. The snow level here in the metro area will drop to the higher hills above 500 feet. Expect about one inch of snow overnight... sticking mainly in the hills. Tomorrow, the snow level will hover at 500 feet.. as 1 to 3 inches is possible. Highs will be near 39 in Portland/Vancouver.

The Cascades Range is under a Winter Storm Warning tonight and tomorrow with another foot of snow possible.

Out of practice? (Day 10)


Day ten was a reminder why you need to keep pace with the HOY7 hunting team.

Today we were joined by founding member and resident 2nd place killing machine "Cliffy" V. We set out early on Thanksgiving day to secure our spot at the legendary twin falls location on the mighty Columbia river. We arrived to the parking lot alone and in sole posession of the best spot possible. After a harrowing 2 minute walk we made it to the water and started the decoy setting and blind building process. With those tasks complete we were able to enjoy some time to sit and reflect on the days folding potential as there was still 30 - 45 minutes before sunrise.

Not long into the days events the picture above was taken. It shows Cliffy in a sad display of what happens when you come illprepared for a H7HT outing. Out of wikki and out of treats. Fortunately his teamates were able to keep the machine going with some smooth 12 year wikki and delicious smokes. The day was saved.

Although we saw few ducks today and were only able to take a shot at a rebel decoy trying to escape, Cliffy learned something. Hunting umbrellas are quite possibly the finest invention to come out of Fred Gs' massive head. I like to think he will also be better prepared for our next outing as well. There you have it, every day a new lesson.

GBCH

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

T-Day Poetry


Stuffing and mashers are the best
Cranberry and sweet potatoes make up the rest

Sometimes a turkey is not on the tray
When a goose gets shot on thanksgiving day

A pumpkin pie and cookies too
I'm gunna kill a goose, how about you?

Day 9


Day nine was cold, wet and lame.
Nothing was learned.
Nothing was killed.
GBCH

Day ten is going to be GREAT!

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

If you see me, shoot me.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Day 8


Day eight and once again we were joined by the newest HOY7 hunting team member Rick. Feeling good about our superior early morning skills we proceded to Sauvies island for the 'wait in line' section of the island. We weren't even that far back in the line but we ended up missing the cut by one truck length. After weighing our options we decide on the ever popular North Unit, and what a trememdous decision it was.

The naps and sandwhiches were great.

We made it back to the sign in shack in time to get the Mudhen # 9 unit for the mid-morning hunt. Our friendly ranger (look at that haircut, anybody with a haircut like that you know he's an asshole) told us that our chances of shooting our limit that day were about nada. He was correct. The tremendous windstorm we had here for the previous two days must have blown all the ducks to Umatilla.

We learned something that day.
Rick should always make lunch.
Waking up at 3:00 may be better than 4:00
The North Unit RULES, just ask Stevearino.

GBCH

Crazy Andy, hutning with a camera.


Hi,
Well it only took 30 hours in a bus seat, 15 hours of flying, 5 monetary currencies, and 3 continents, but I was able to climb up the bottom slopes of an old volcano (15,000 feet), thru a lush rain forest to visit 16 gorillas for an hour......it was really amazing. This is the place that Dian Fossy died trying to protect the gorillas and her grave is on the mountain. The park only recently re-opened several years ago after a brutal civil war and genocide.

As I was sitting taking video of a gorilla, something hit my shoulder and almost rolled into my lap...a little gorilla...I don't know who was more scared.

Now I'm back in Kigali, the capitol of Rwanda, and staying in a nice hotel.....well, the room is an extension of the nice hotel....I get the beautiful breakfast buffet, but stay across the street for a bargain rate of 18 bucks a night...Kigali is not cheap.

I hadn't fully read my guide book and missed the section that stated "feel lucky if you get running water in this class of hotel"....well it wasn't my lucky day...or lucky 3 days. When I tried to flush the toilet in the shared bathroom...mosquitoes flew from the stagnant water in the bowl above the toilet.

But, the breakfast buffet is really nice and the hotel staff bring a warm bucket of water to bath with in the morning and the toilets in the main hotel are very nice.

Sincerely,
Andy

Friday, November 17, 2006

Facts

Eyes
Ducks can see for a very long way thanks to their very sharp vision. They can also see almost 360 degrees as their eyes are on either side of their heads. The only problem is that they don't have effective tear ducts which is why they need water to regularly clean and moisten their eyes.

Bill
A duck's bill is a triumph of evolutionary tool making. They are designed for scooping up water and rootling around for insects and other tasty morsels in the ground. The nostrils are located near the head end of their bill allowing them to find food in water without having to hold their breath. The top half of the duck's bill, called the 'upper mandible', is an extension of the skull and is fixed in place. Only the lower mandible is hinged and it does all the moving. The bill is covered in a layer of Keratin which is continually being worn down and regrown.

Feet
Along with the bill, a duck's feet are its most characteristic symbol. The webbing between their toes is a form of subaqua turbocharger which makes high speed swimming a doddle but is also ideal for paddling around in water. Although their feet look soft, be careful when handing your duck, as they have small nails on the end of their toes.

Feathers
Even up close the feathers on a duck seem to be one seemless blanket, each one overlapping and linking in to create a smooth, streamlined surface. They keep their feathers looking smart by regularly preening themselves. During this preening the bill rubs oil from a gland at the base of their tail. They then use the bill to coat their feathers with a fine layer of oil to make themselves waterproof. Ducklings get this oil from their mother until they have developed their own feathers. Ducks also have different layers of feathers making them able to cope with all sorts of conditions. Under the outer feathers they have a thick layer of fine down which insulates them and allows them to swim around all day on cold water.

Tail
The tail is often a good indicator of the sex of a duck. If you see couple of small curly feathers in its tail then it is likely that it is a mature male.
WingsMost ducks have a range of features which allow them to fly high and over long distances. They have aerodynamic body shapes and are able to tuck their feet in to further streamline their appearance. Unlike chickens their wings are strong and have large, well developed flight feathers.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Guest editor


HA! I am Greenie and I rule.

Here it is over a month into the season and still I am worth $10. That is because you ignorant hunters do not have the skill and fortitude to take me out of the sky. Your worthless Italian guns and pitiful attempt at concealment are no match for my walnut sized brain. I will evade your 3 1/2" shells like they contain nothing more than rice crispys and fly past you so fast you can not even see me. Good luck getting that 10 spot, loser bitches.

I quack in your general direction.
Two men go duck hunting. They settle down in their hide and start waiting for the ducks. This gets rapidly boring for one of them so he reaches into his backpack and withdraws a bottle of 100 proof scotch. "Want some?" he asks his mate.
"No, I've got to concentrate on hunting ducks."
"Okay..." he says and happily drains the bottle.

They go back to watching for ducks. Again, the man gets bored and gets from his backpack another bottle of scotch. "Want some." he asks again.
"No, thanks" is his reply
"Your loss." he says and happily drains the bottle.

He's pretty sloshed by now, but goes back to help his friend watch for ducks. A minute later, a single duck flies up. "Bang!!!" goes his mates gun. "Damn, missed" his mate says.
The man waves his gun in the general direction of the sky. "Bang!!!" his gun goes.
He kills the duck straight.
"Wow," says his mate, "how did you do that?"
"Well," he replied, "when there's a whole flock, you can hardly miss, can you?"

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Genius or Pansy ?


The Hunting Umbrella.
You be the judge.
Vote in the comment section.
GBCH

Monday, November 13, 2006

Showin' out for the team.


As you may or may not have heard, Mt Hood Meadows has suffered a major blow to the ski season. Our nonstop "pinapple express" weather pattern has left us drenched with warm rain this fall. Not only is it not snowing it also has rained in such Hestonesque proportions that it has damaged the roads to the ski area. One bridge to the area is likely dammaged. DOT officials can not make a realistic estimate for its repair due to the 5 feet of rocks and mud jammed under, on and around the bridges structure. It is basically covered with mountian where it used to be 15 - 20 feet above the water.

The other road to the area sustained a tiny little washout when the swolen creek jumped the road and created a river on both sides. The road is basically gone for a stretch of 8 to 9 miles. (It is actually very impressive how much it has been destroyed, check it out at
http://www.kgw.com/news-local/stories/kgw_110806_weather_highway_35_.1ae8805e.html ) The best estimate for any traffic to get to the ski area is sometime around the end of January, to which I say "NO PROBLEM". Hunting season dosen't end untill Jan 28th anyway.

I had my pass photo, seen above, taken well before any indication of these events. As you can see I am hypeing the HOY7 hunting team above all else. Coincidence?..... I think not!

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Day Seven


Day Seven is always an important day for the HOY7 Hunting Team. Today I will let the picture speak for itself. There is only one problem with the picture. The rainbow should actually be shining directly from Freds' ass, that's the kind of day he had.

Sometimes it's not good enough to be the 'expert', you also need to be the best. Now I know as well as you do that the HOY7 hunting team is the best team out there but every team has its outstanding member. Not only did he finish all his wikki, not only did he enjoy three whole smokie treats, and not only did he invent the next great hunting accessory, the man also folded the most beautiful duck on the planet. Sometimes the sun is shining on you and sometimes the whole damn rainbow is shining on you. Heston bless you Fred G. I'm just glad to have been able to bask in the shadow of your glory.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Lineage


This is my Grandfather, Clyde McKinley Campbell. He was born in Michigan and moved to Connecticut where he met my Grandmother and got married. There he raised field trials dogs and hunted on a regular basis as all cool Grandfaters did. This picture was taken Thanksgiving day sometime in the 40s out on the family farm in Kent. It appears that he folded a nice fat pheasant that day with some help from his dog, Duncan City Boy.

In 1940 he had the joy of a wonderful baby girl come into his life. This little girl would someday get married to a fine Italian guy and they in turn would have two sons. This is where I come into the picture. A dorky kid from Cheshire. I attended Cheshire High School, where in 1982 I met a troubled asthmatic kid who liked to fight above his ability, Fred G. Much later Fred and I formed the storied and world renowned HOY7 hunting team.

This brings us to day six.

On day six I had great reaction time and folded a duck at the old new spot. It landed in the water and slowly floated away from the point at which I could retrieve it. The wind and tidal influences took the downed duck all the way across the river to an area which I could not get to. After a feeble attempt to cross the river I was thwarted by high water over the giant hole in my waders and my fear of drowning. Dwayne, as we named him, died an unnecessary death.

I told this sad story today because I'm sure my Grandfather would not be pleased with my hunting skills. I learned something today. Don't shoot beyond your ability to get your duck. Always wear the waders without the giant hole. And finally, I need a good dog. Rest in peace Dwayne.

GBCH

Day Six

With a new member in tow we head out to the Old New Spot. It's a balmy 65 degrees at 5 am and the rain is coming down in sheets. As always this morning was filled with anticipation because of a couple of things; how much are we going to fold today, and that we were about to embark on new territory, teaching a friend the art of hunting the Hoy 7 Hunting Team way. We also have a new ear to tell lore to, of past killing sprees and of high school past, I don't know who is more lucky him or us. We hike out, set up and cause now that I have my asthma under control the whiskey bottles crack open. Rick looks at us with disbelief, and Bob sees the dibelief in his eyes and asks the question "do you know what Jenny X is doing right now?" and with that Rick takes a swig. Remember the new territory I spoke of earlier, well it's in full swing now, we are on our way as a team. It's a quiet and wet morning, very wet. Action is none until out of nowhere two ducks come screaming into our deeks (spieces unkown, more on that in a minute) and quick draw Bob folded before I could even get another swig off the old bottle. Well here in the picture tells the whole story. Bob with a stick, duck out in front of him, comes back with only stick in hand, almost first duck of year. Sorry Grampa Clyde. Day ended uneventful, no more shots but a lot more rain. Welcome new team member Rick, good luck .

Fred G Out!

Monday, November 06, 2006

Welcome New Team Member





We would like to welcome our new member, Rick. The only person that said "hey I want to go hunting with you guys" and actually get a license and show up at 4:45 am. Welcome Rick, happy hunting!

Friday, November 03, 2006

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Shotgun Methodology By Fred G.



No, not that kind.

This is a pictoral demonstration of the proper way to do a shotgun.

-Chose an easy drinkin beer like a Budweiser, the king of beers.

-Use your car keys to poke a hole in the bottom side of the can. ( Keep the keys handy so you can drive later)

-Lift the hole in the can to your mouth.

-Pull the trigger.

-Drink the whole thing without spilling any on your two collar shirts or the 'M' watch.

-Belch.

-Repeat.


We have a reader!


Luch,

This is great! How and the fuck do I post a comment on "Jenny I'm not so X". To make matters worse in July, I actually came 5 seconds away from throwing my driver into the cart of two fucking old men who were MF'n my buddy and I for taking to long on the tee box while drinking Jack, and it so happens it was Willis Case, the same course we played when I told that other old man to shut his suck. I don't know what it is with Cadiliiac drivin, metamucil drinking, and diper wearning old men who want to fight me. Next time I am just going to push them over in their cart and see if they can get out, unless I get my ass beat, which would be damn funny! Tell me how I can interject on the blog.

Peace,
A Beaner with Love,
Jiggity