Bobs' or Freds' ?

Damn, that's the best looking car yet.

The history of Jenny X. part VII

I think we all know about the many passions of Jenny X. But did you know Jenny also participates in the Bass Anglers Sportsmans Society anual fishing derby? This years winner of the BASS tournament is none other than Jenny X. As no text accompanied this photo I will do my level best to describe the days events.

"I woke up extra early this morning and went to the BASS tournament. I have won the thing 24 times already but figured I might give it another try. Preparing myself for the day with a few shots of vodka and a suitcase of beers, I boarded the yacht and made my way to the center of the lake. My first cast hit the water and I pulled up the winner shown in this pic.

"Being that I knew I had the thing wraped up already I downed 16 of the 24 beers and took a nap. When I woke up my yacht had drifted over to the Maxim 'Hot 100' party and I shared my remaing beers with supermodels Giselle and Heidi Klum. They gave me a 4 hour massage and and I returned to the dock in time to get my trophy.

"Not bad for a paid sick day I took off from work."

Well, there you have it. Just another day in the life.
So endeth the lesson of Jenny X.

I'm Tradin the Duc In For One Of These

13 Reasons Not To Drink With Your Friends

No. 8

The Gossip Game

THE GOSSIP GAME this week brought to you by Sherril's.
According to the game’s rules, Fred G tells four gossip stories, only three of which are allegedly true. Everyone then guesses which story is fake. Here are the stories Fred offered this morning: (1) Paris Hilton ordered a helicopter pilot to land the aircraft so she could urinate. (2) Britney Spears was encouraged by women in a restaurant to not let the rumors about her bad parenting get her down, and she paid their bill. (3) Hugh Jackman was informed the “American Idol” parking lot was filled when he tried to get a spot, and he thought he was on another episode of “Punk’d.” (4) Kelly Pickler and Ace Young couldn’t get backstage at the “American Idol” finale. Good Luck.

If You See Me, Shoot Me.

This species might better be called the "Ring-billed Duck," for its chestnut neck ring is usually seen only at close range, while the white ring on the bill can be a prominent field mark. More partial to acid ponds and lakes in wooded regions than other diving ducks, it eats the seeds of aquatic plants as well as snails and insects. Because it never gathers in large flocks it has not been hunted extensively like some of its relatives. A fast flier, the Ring-neck undertakes longer migrations than most other diving ducks.
description 14-18" (36-46 cm). Male has black back and breast; purple-glossed, black-appearing angular head; pale gray flanks; vertical white mark on side of breast. Female brownish, paler around base of bill, with narrow white eye ring. Bill pale gray with white ring. The high angular shape of the head and white ring on bill distinguish this bird from the scaup.

BBQ anyone?

The HOY7 hunting team would like to invite you to our summer BBQ at the clubhouse. Activities include swimming, lounging, drinking and horseshoes. Reserve your spot now by sending $400 cash to:

HOY7 HT Getaway
1040 NE 78th
Portland, OR.
97214

For this low, low price you can bring all the friends you want and never have to worry about food or beverages. Everything is provided right down to the coplimentary massages from the world renown M spa of San Fransisco.

See you there.

Bobs' or Freds' ?

Pack up the truck.

Mark your calenders for the 6th annual Oregon Waterfowl Festival, August 11, 12, 13, 2006. The all new Festival will be BIGGER and BETTER! We are moving to Mitchell's Sporting Clays in Gervis, Oregon. Located halfway between Portland and Salem, along I-5.

Bring the family and enjoy a fun filled Waterfowlers weekend. Top names in the industry will be on hand to introduce you to the latest products, conduct duck and goose calling clinics, seminars on better strategies, and tips for the coming season. Some of the biggest names have joined us in previous years; Tim Grounds, Ron Latschaw, Jim Ronquest, Buck Gardner, Barnie Calef, Kelly Powers, Bill Saunders, Dave Smith Chad Belding, Stuart McCullough and others. This year will be no exception with the top innovators in the waterfowl industry attending.

New events have been added: A 3 man team sporting clays shoot with great prizes. We also changed the dog event to include both a combined fastest water and fastest land retreive contest. Other events planned for the weekend include: The West's best BBQ on Friday Night Sponsored by Avery Outdoors and The Saturday Night BBQ by the OWF. There will also be Lots of Kids events, Boat/Blind contests, Decoy carving contest, Silent and Oral auctions, seminars, demonstrations, and more.
The vendor list will include; Wildlife Artists, Call Makers, Gun Manufacturers, Decoy Manufacturers, Decoy Carvers, Retreiver Trainers and Breeders, Boats, Collectors and all things related to waterfowling.

You will also hear the Northwests top Duck and Goose callers compete in calling contests throughout the weekend. The title of Oregon State Duck Calling Champion is on the line, with the winner representing Oregon at the World Duck Calling Championship in Stuttgart, Arkansas. Other contests include the Oregon State Goose, Open Regional Goose, Two Man Goose, Novice Goose, Columbia River Open Duck, Novice Duck and Regional 2 Man Duck. We have also added a Pro/Am Duck Calling contest, where all callers get to blow a two man routine with some of the World Duck Calling Finalists.

Mmmmmm .

Orange Duck Recipe :

1 Tablespoon of Vegetable Oil
1/3 Cup of Orange Juice
2 Tablespoons Grated Orange Peel
1/2 Cup Can of Peaches, Pureed
1/2 Cup Can of Pineapple, Pureed
1/3 Cup Whipping Cream
1 Tsp. Bacon Drippings
2 Tablespoon Butter
1/2 Tsp. Chopped Fresh Garlic
1 Tsp. Tomato Paste
1 Cup Chicken Broth
1 Tablespoon Clover Honey


In a large skillet, heat oil and add 1 tablespoon butter and bacon drippings. Once the oil is hot, add mushrooms and sauté for about a couple minutes. Remove and set aside. Add garlic and brown duck breasts on both sides, remove and set aside. Add the remaining butter and reduce heat to simmer. Once the butter is melted add orange rind, tomato paste, chicken broth, honey, and orange juice. Stir over medium low heat until mixture comes to a boil. Add pineapple and peach, bring back to a light boil. Place breasts in a large pot and coat with sauce. Cook over low heat about 20 minutes. Arrange breasts on serving platter. Whisk whipped cream into sauce and add mushrooms. Put sauce over breasts and place in the broiler. Brown lightly and serve.

Just Sold On E-Bay For $2,500,000

Apparently you could see Elvis' face in the rust.

Why Do Women Outlive Men?

The history of Jenny X. part VI

The X stands for EXTREME.

Regular readers of this blog know that Jenny is, among other things, a master of camoflage the proud owner of both a canoe AND an over-under & the best shot at his local gun club. But did you know that Jenny X is also the world record holder in the 1992 Big Air contest at Breckenridge? This is photographic proof that Jenny can throw down the nose bleeds when it matters. His massive 6 to 8 inches of air may seem paltry today but back in those days that was EXTREME. If memory serves after booting this humungous Scott Schmidt iron cross tip drop monster, he was asked to be on the cover of Sports Illustrated. Being the understated player he is, he turned them down. But now you all know. This photo proves who the baddest mofo on the mountain really is.
So endeth the lesson of Jenny X.

A Moment of Quiet Reflection.

The HOY7 hunting team would like to take this opportunity to send our best wishes to Brother B. As he embarks on a new path of sobriety and cleanliness we ask him to remember his friends are there for him. Happy Trails Brother!

Bobs' or Freds' ?

Not too far away.

The sun has been up for a while now and you have gotten off some good shots. A couple of fat greeenies are by your side in the blind and you still have the rest of the day to reach your limit. As you settle in for the next few hours the deeks look good and a light breeze is starting to pick up, you know that there are enough shells and supplies to keep you content for as long as the ducks keep flying.

This thought is brought to you by your good friends at the HOY7 hunting team and Mr Charlton Heston.

" I suck."

Lets Keep It Real...What Team Members Car Is This?

Gossip Game Answer

Well folks this weeks answer is brought to you by yo guessed it the Browning Cynergy Over Under, cause everyone needs one. The answer is number (4) Tori Spelling’s mom, Candy, sent her daughter dish towels for a present after her daughter got married against her wishes. Hate to say it but there were no winners this week, but stay tuned for next weeks game.

Bobs' or Freds' ?

Ode to Winchester

Winchester has left the States.
They made guns, some were great.
Now they only make guns in Japan.
I have to say I'm not a fan.
Someday maybe they will come back.
One more gun equals one less quack.

Guest Editor

Hey bitches,
It's me, Greenie, again. I'm droping you all a line to let you know that I have sucessfully bred a whole bunch of little ducklings for this year. They are swimming around right now in the waters of your golf courses and eating lots of grasses and algee so that they may take a big dookie on the fairway for your ball to land in. Then they will be big and strong so that when you empty your shitty guns trying to kill them they will fly by at warp speed. Some of them may turn around and fly back in order to taunt you and let you know what kind of losers you are. I will personally teach them that trick you stupid jerks. Ha Ha Ha. I quack in your general direction.

13 Reasons Not To Drink With Your Friends

No. 7

Trap Champ.

Today the HOY7 Hunting Team went to the lovely hamlet of Hillsboro to do a little trap shooting. Regular readers of this blog will remember that in the past only Jenny X was fortunate enough to have a trap feild near his home. Well some of our goodspirted readers must have taken this to heart and built a couple trap feilds just for us.

No more do we have to throw our own clays and shoot one at a time. There is a machine purpose built for that. This allows us to just yell "pull" and clay pigeons magically fly off for us to obliterate with some lead ($), not steel ($$$$), shot. Also someone picks up our shells for us after we are done. Take THAT Jenny.

I'm proud to say that todays champion was........ Fred G. Congratulations Fred G for being the best darn shot this side of Skyline Dr.

Bobs' or Freds' ?

Welcome Twice

This is Twice. So named because it took me two trys to get him in the mail. The first time he went to Texas and everyone knows that Texas is full of 'idjots' who don't deserve the kind of beauty that Twice represents. Anyway, welcome to the flotilla Twice, you lookin' good.

Why Do Women Outlive Men?

The Gossip Game

THE GOSSIP GAME brought to you this week from Hussey's. If we all Remember according to the contest’s rules, Fred G tells four gossip stories, only three of which are allegedly true. Everyone then tries to pick out which of the stories is the fake. The following are the reports Fred G gave this morning: (1) Denise Richards was turned away by the owner of a boutique and had her housekeeper quit on her because the two wanted to remain loyal to another one of their clients, Heather Locklear, whose now ex-husband she is dating. (2) Charlie Sheen and Matthew Perry hit on two young women at a Los Angeles club, only to be turned down because one of the girls thought they were too old. (3) Teri Hatcher was shocked she didn’t make People’s list of the 100 Most Beautiful People, and refused to attend a party held in honor of her “Desperate Wives” co-stars who did. (4) Tori Spelling’s mom, Candy, sent her daughter dish towels for a present after her daughter got married against her wishes.

13 Reasons Not To Drink With Your Friends

A Recap:

(Remember You Can Click On Picture To Make It Larger)

No. 1 No.2

No. 3 No. 4

No. 5 No. 6

Fred G Is BACK!

You can't see me! Hello do you know me? Thats right I'm back and better than ever. I'm not rested I might even have a little head tickle right now, but I'm back and maybe better then ever. I want to thank Bob for keepin things flowin while I was absent, Thanks Bob! I'd medicated to bring back the old fav's, some new and exciting stuff and I'm even considering making up some shit! So grab a beer or in our case a 1/5 of SoCo and a 1/5 of Jameson, and a CAMEL (only 5 months 4 days Bob you could make it) cause we don't want to forget our sponsors. Relax, chill let us entertain you. Hello.

Happy Mothers Day !

Hi Nanny,
Hi Grampy.

Guest Editor

Hello, my name is Greenie.
I laugh at your inability to shoot me at this time of the year. If it were up to me hunting season would be confined to the 15 minutes it takes for you to pull on your waders and get ready to walk your lazy ass to the blind. Likely you couldn't hit me anyway, what with your crappy Italian gun and all. lucky for me you are such a bad shot, and I can see your blind from a mile away you stupid American truck driving losers. I quack in your general direction.

Greenie.

Good Dog.

The Board of Directors of The American Kennel Club approved the admission of the Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever into the Miscellaneous Class at their June 2001 meeting. Tollers became eligible to compete in the Miscellaneous Class, Obedience, Tracking, Agility and Junior Showmanship at AKC events held on and after September 1, 2001 and subsequently became eligible to compete in Hunt Tests on June 1, 2002.

Match Game 06'

Bobs' or Freds' ?

Stupid poetry.

A short poem about ducks

Ducks have feathers colored green;
That's why they're so quickly seen.
With flapping wings and beaks that preen
Ducks are great!
They're really keen!
Don't hunt ducks if it is rainy;
Don't hunt ducks or be called zany;
Don't hunt ducks if you are brainy;
Don't hunt ducks with Richard Cheney.
Let ducks live, a panacea
For the problems that we see-
aHunting ducks--a bad idea!
Shame on you, Justice Scalia.

Be Kind in the Blind.

Duck Hunting Incident Makes Defendant Ask For New Judge

Saturday, April 29, 2006
By LISA BOSE McDERMOTT Texarkana Gazette

A Fouke, Ark., native wants a new judge in his capital murder case because he thinks a duck hunting argument many years ago will work against him in court, but Circuit Judge Jim Hudson isn’t so sure he is going to step down.
Edward Ray Burgess, 43, who lives in Hot Springs, Ark., is to go on trial for capital murder in the death of Francis “Frank” Cullinan, 38.

The dispute, according to motions and briefs filed on Burgess’ behalf, center around duck hunting rights. Burgess says the decade-old exchange became somewhat heated.

The defendant is concerned that there may be times that the judge will rule on motions and other matters and his conduct of a trial in which he will reflect back on the controversy that he had with the defendant and the defendant’s hunting party. This has the potential for the judge to recall an unpleasant event and that his rulings and his conduct at trial could be affected by his own personal experiences with the defendant,” according to Hurst’s brief.

Match game 06'

Bobs' or Freds' ?

Another suggestion

In case the duck boat idea has been taken. Fred G likes Ford Trucks.

Don't Forget

Remember not to forget that Fred G has a birthday coming up and he NEEDS a duck hunting boat. He's too shy to buy one for himself so we are counting on you to start the process. This is just an example but I'm sure there are many styles out there that would work. God Bless. You have a lovely home.

Match Game 06'

Here's how it works. Match the automobile to the member of the HOY7 hunting team who owns or owned it. Easy enough? It's 50 - 50 people so get involved because there are BIG prizes for those of you who answer correctly. (Bob & Fred not eligible)

Teaser

MIGRATION UPDATE – April 27, 2006 Reports are starting to come across the desk of some early goose broods in several parts of the US. All across the breeding grounds the spring renewal is building. With conditions on the breeding ground steadily improving the duck factory looks to be primed and ready for production.

Hello folks, and as always, welcome to Waterfowler.com. Though the snow geese have not made it home just yet, the bulk of North America’s waterfowl are settling in to their summer homes across the upper tier of the flyways. In just a few short weeks the May Pond Count survey flights will begin, and the first glimpse of the waterfowl season to come will begin to take shape. Even though it is the ‘off season’ the next few months provide some edge of your seat tension for the hardcore waterfowler. Ahead are crucial decisions in congress for funding of important conservation programs, the first sneak peaks at next year’s toys, tools and of course, the surveys that help our wildlife managers set seasons and bag limits for the next regular waterfowl season. In the life of the dedicated duck and goose hunter, there really is no ‘off season.’

If You See Me...Shoot Me.

CANVASBACK DUCK (Aythya valisineria: aithya is Greek for seabird; valisneria comes from Vallisneria americana, the freshwater plant wild celery, which is one of the canasback's favorite food.)
OTHER NAMES: Bullneck, can, canard cheval, canny, canvas, gray duck, hickory-quaker, horse-duck, red-headed bullneck, sheldrake, and whiteback.
One of the largest North American diving ducks, the canvasback gets its name from its pale gray back and white sides which are delicately dotted and lined in a wavelike pattern resembling canvas fabric. Both males and females have long, sloping foreheads that in profile show a continuous line with the long, dark wedge-shaped bill. The male, or drake, has a rust-red head, black breast and rear, and a gray-white back. The female has a gray-white back, and a brown head and neck. Their eyes are like red rubies.

Summer is coming

"Summertime is coming. Get yourself a nice tan and start working out for Moses' sake."

Chucker?

Chuck, is that you?